What's Gonna Be Cooked For Thanksgiving?

Dang, I hate turkey. I have cooked it every way, from classical in-the-oven, to deep-fried in peanut oil. There are always raw spots and over-cooked spots due to the turkey’s physique. Also, we buy sliced turkey at Food Lion for sandwiches during the week. I am tired of turkeys. I am tired of seeing the turkey commercials on TV. I am tired of the unending recipes in the papers that start after Halloween. I am tired of the morning talk shows and their people showing how to cook turkeys.

This year, the Red Neck Chef’s family will be diverting from the unimaginative turkey spread…we’re gonna have Peking Duck with Mandarin pancakes, fried rice, hot and sour soup, and fried shrimp puffs. I will showyou how to make fried rice in another recipe. For the soup and shrimp puffs, you are on your own. But I will show you how I am going to make the duck and pancakes.

Ingredients

One 6 pound duck
8 cups of water
Some ginger slices
Some green onions, sliced longways
1/8 cup of sugar
2 tablespoons of white vinegar
A shot of sherry
A mixture of cornstarch and water

Get the duck frozen at Food Lion and let it thaw out. Wipe it dry and tie a string around the neck where the head used to be. If the neck is barely there, you can take the string and put it under the poor duck's little used-to-be wings. Hang it in your darkened closet or mud room for about four hours. Place an electric fan in the closet to blow air on the duck. Make sure you put some newspaper down on the floor to catch the dripping blood. After about 4 hours, put the water in a large pot and add the ginger, onions, sugar, vinegar, and sherry. Bring it to a boil. Add the cornstarch mixture (appx ½ cup) into the water and stir, stir, stir. Get the duck and put it in a strainer above a larger bowl/container. Scoop the boiling mixture over the duck for 10-15 minutes. After that, hang the duck back into the closet and turn on the fan again. Leave it for 6 to 7 hours or until dry. Place the duck breast side up on a roasting rack and cook at 350 degrees for 30 minutes. Put some water in the roasting pan above the roasting rack. Turn the duck over and roast for another 30 minutes. Turn it over again with the breast side up, for another 10 minutes. The duck should be done. Cut off the crispy skin and set aside on a warming platter. Slice the duck in thin pieces. Place bits of the duck meat, skin, green onion, on a pancake, or flour tortilla. Pour some store-bought hoisin sauce over it and fold the tortilla up. Eat with fried rice, oriental soup, and other appetizers. A good cold beer is excellent with this dish, as well as champagne.

This may not be traditional. If your tradition included overcooked turkey, dry dressing, and nasty relatives, go ahead and indulge. If you want something a little different, be bold. If you screw up, there is always next year.